Kim Jae-joong was once kissed in his sleep by a stalker who invaded his home

Just how obsessed can fans get?

To K-pop idol Kim Jae-joong, the answer is scarily so. The 38-year-old, formerly a member of pioneering K-pop boy band TVXQ, recently revealed that he was kissed in his sleep by a sasaeng. The Korean term means “private life”, and it is used to refer to obsessive fans who stalk their idols.

Kim, who made his debut in 2003, said in a special episode of his YouTube talk show Jaefriends posted on June 27 that he was kissed in his sleep by a sasaeng.

Kim, who is usually the host for Jaefriends, appeared as a guest on his own show. K-pop boy band The Boyz’ Younghoon, 26, stepped in to host for that day.

Near the end of the 20-minute episode, Kim and Younghoon began discussing sasaengs, with Kim sharing his encounters with fans who invaded his privacy.

As one of the five original members of TVXQ – a seminal boy band credited with pioneering the Hallyu wave in South-east Asia and Japan – Kim was subjected to much obsessive fan behaviour at the height of his fame. He left the group in 2009 over contractual disputes.

To the horror of Younghoon, Kim shared his story of being kissed by a woman who broke into his home.

“The girl who kissed me while I was sleeping was caught in my home. If this happened now, she might have gone to jail,” Kim recounted.

He did not reveal when the incident happened or whether the woman received any punishment.

Referring to the Keanu Reeves-headlined Hollywood action film John Wick (2014) which is set in a world of killers and assassins, Kim says his stalkers were like “killers” following him the moment he knocked off from work. Some even lay in wait for him in his home.

He recalled: “I was at home. I received a photo from my phone from an unknown number in a text message. I saw it and was like ‘Uh, that’s a photo of my back right now. This means they are at home with me right now?’”

He said the constant stalking left him feeling paranoid and distressed, and he often checked his surroundings to make sure he was not being watched.

“I really lived like a prisoner,” he said. “I could feel happiness only when the sasaengs disappeared. I found that happiness could be recovered.”

He added that he is particularly thankful to South Korean singer-actress IU for taking legal action against stalkers and fans who invade her privacy.

“It was a good opportunity to recognise that this is an act that can cause great harm to humans.”

Kim is celebrating his 20th anniversary in show business with the release of his new album Flower Garden. It includes a song titled Don’t, which addresses his sasaengs.

Paired with an upbeat melody, the lyrics include lines such as, “I shouldn’t have picked up the phone/I cried as I heard your voice/I cannot see you during my busy schedule, but you call me only when I come home”.

In a July 19 episode of the YouTube talk show Today’s Joo Woo-jae, hosted by the South Korean actor, Kim said his experiences are horror stories, which he mostly kept mum about. Joo, 37, added that he thought the tales were made up because they were so extreme.

“They were terrible for what they did,” Kim said. “I was afraid they would do something more extreme if I told everyone the truth.”

He added that at the time, society also had a misconception that these obsessive stalkers were simply passionate fans, and he lamented the lenient punishment for such stalkers.

“Imagine you get stalked for a year, it’s so distressing that you want to take your own life. But the punishment for the stalker is only a fine between 1.5 million won (S$1,450) and three million won.”

And even when perpetrators end up going to prison, victims are so scared of retaliation when the perpetrators are released that they end up moving neighbourhoods to avoid their stalkers, he said.

Previously, stalking was classified as a minor misdemeanour in South Korea with a maximum fine of 100,000 won or up to 29 days in jail. It was only in 2021, after intense public criticism about weak laws failing to deter such crimes, that the country enacted its first law specifically targeting stalking.

While Kim – who carved out a successful solo career after TVXQ and is now chief strategy officer and co-founder of the entertainment agency Inkode – is now able to look back at these experiences with a witty song, it was not easy then.

“Now it feels like it’s not a big deal, but I suffered to death at the time.”