How to make everyone think you are rolling in money

Watching David Yong’s feature in Netflix’s Super Rich In Korea and reading all of these articles about him got me thinking: Wouldn’t it be amazing to be super rich?

Imagine being able to wave a wad of cash like it’s nothing, roll up in the back of a Rolls Royce, and take the private jet to exotic locales on a whim. Better yet, imagine all the attention being super rich would get you!

But let’s be real, most of us are stuck in the land of “regular”, working hard, paying bills and dreaming of weekends.

However, just because you can’t afford a private island doesn’t mean you can’t look like you can. Who needs actual wealth when you can fake it ‘til you (hopefully) make it?

Here’s a bunch of things you can do to make everyone think you’re part of the top 1 per cent.

1. Time is money, so show everyone you have it

First things first, invest in a timepiece that screams “I’m worth more than you”. Think Patek Philippe, Rolex or something equally eye-catching.

Can’t afford to wear something that costs as much as a BTO? Don’t sweat it! Several upstart watch brands offer affordable models with a skeleton face, revealing intricate gears and mechanisms that instantly give you a sophisticated look.

Rectangular watches with roman numerals set on an off-white dial are also strong indicators that you’re a person of taste and – more importantly – means. So be sure to get one of those while you’re at it.

2. casually drop brand names in conversations

Don’t ever just say, “I’m taking the car out for a drive.” Always go with, “I’m going to spend some quality time with the McLaren.”

If you don’t drop the make and model of your ride in every conversation, how will your friends know that you’re better than them?

For those who don’t drive because COE and fuel prices give you a mini heart attack, you can still flex your material wealth with anything you own.

This isn’t a mere bag, it’s a Birkin. And these aren’t shoes, they’re Louboutins.

If someone says your luxury item looks fake or unrecognisable, just tell them it’s part of a yet-to-be-released line. That’ll shut them up for sure.

3. Dress to impress with a multi-layered outfit

That blazer that’s been hanging in your closet ever since you first (and last) wore it at a friend’s wedding? Consider it now a part of your regular fit.

And before you start whining about how Singapore’s too hot and humid to suit up, remember that rich people never succumb to the heat. They’re always in air-conditioned environments, and the only times they brave the elements are when they’re walking out of their villa into their limousine.

So next time someone brings up the weather, just talk about how you haven’t noticed because you’re always feeling chilly. Bonus points if you clutch at your thick jacket to really show you aren’t drenched in sweat underneath.

4. Humblebrag about your "multi-hyphenate" hustle

Make your current job sound more exciting. For example, are you a cashier at a supermarket? Call yourself a "retail specialist". Do you work in a library? No, you’re a "knowledge consultant".

And forget having just one job. Embrace the “multi-hyphenate” lifestyle. If you have an iPhone, that just means you “have a vested interest in Apple”. Having a video game addiction translates to having “spent a lot of time in the gaming industry”.

Then you can start moaning about how you’ve just been so busy recently, juggling all your assets and responsibilities.

You know, like a rich person.

5. Your life is a movie and everyone’s got front-row seats

Make every day feel like a scene from a movie. Document your weekend travels (Sentosa counts as overseas), your luxurious meals (show people you can afford to upsize your drinks at fast food eateries), and share them frequently on social media.

The goal is to make people either want to be you or want to be with you. So make sure to schedule your posts on weekday mornings just to rub it into the faces of your pleb friends who're stuck in the MRT and dreading the workday ahead.

Being super rich is all about creating an image, a narrative that paints a picture of privilege. It's all about playing up your assets, exuding confidence and projecting an aura of affluence.

Remember, it’s not about the actual amount in your bank account, it’s about feeling like a million bucks. It's the confidence, the style, the swagger that sets the richest people in the world apart from the rest of us, and it's something anyone can cultivate.