From addict to advocate: Son's ultimatum snaps woman out of spiral

Madam Salimah Sukar exudes a warmth that fills the room.

With a gentle smile and kind eyes, the 59-year-old motherly figure seems a world away from the hardened image of a drug addict.

Yet, beneath the surface lies a life of struggle, resilience and ultimately, redemption.

“I made a lot of mistakes,” she says, her voice husky with emotion. “But every day is a chance to make amends, to be a better mother, a better person.”

In 1986, Madam Salimah married a man who, unbeknownst to her, was entangled in the clutches of heroin.

Naive to the world of addiction, she initially dismissed his erratic behavior and pleas for money.

One day, returning home early from work, she stumbled upon the devastating truth. "He with his friend in the room, using drugs."

The discovery launched her into a turbulent period. In an attempt to understand her husband's addiction, she tried heroin, a decision that rapidly spiraled into dependence.

The marriage, already strained, deteriorated further as her husband grew increasingly abusive, culminating in a terrifying incident where he threatened to push her from the 14th storey of their block.

Saved by a neighbour’s intervention, Madam Salimah filed a police report and initiated divorce proceedings.

Freedom from her husband, however, did not bring freedom from addiction.

Lonely, isolated and lacking support, she relapsed, her drug use escalating to trafficking.

“My supply was gone, so I went to find it,” she explains. “This time, I can’t blame anyone because it was my choice.”

Madam Salimah remarried. Her second husband had never used drugs but their life together eventually drew him into her addiction.

It was during this tumultuous time that her life again took a dark turn.

While waiting at a bus stop one day, she was approached by police officers who, trained to recognise the subtle signs of drug use, suspected her involvement.

A search confirmed their suspicions, and she was arrested, leading to six months of court-ordered rehabilitation.

However, the rehabilitation proved futile. Relapse followed, then another arrest in 2010 – this time with her husband – witnessed by their youngest daughter.

“My daughter cried to the officer, ‘Please don’t take my mother away, don’t take her,’” she remembers, the anguish etched on her face.

During her six-year imprisonment, separated from her four children, Madam Salimah was consumed by guilt.

“I had nightmares about my children because I left them when they were still young,” she recalls, the pain still palpable.

She endured her sentence with no visits from her children, who were in the care of her in-laws.

In her fourth year, Madam Salimah discovered New Life Stories, a non-profit organisation supporting incarcerated parents and their families.

The organisation’s approach uses storytelling as a tool for connection. Under the guidance of trained counsellors, Madam Salimah wrote Hungry Fina, a children's book, channeling her emotions onto the page.

The book and audio recordings of her reading it, bridged the prison walls, allowing her to express her love and remorse.

Through The Salvation Army, a Mother's Day visit was arranged. The reunion was a torrent of conflicting emotions.

Seeing her children again, though a source of immense joy, also intensified the guilt and shame she carried.

While the visit itself was a powerful catalyst, the true turning point came later, after her release in 2015.

Her eldest son, now old enough to fully grasp the impact of her addiction and incarceration, delivered an ultimatum that would forever alter the course of her life.

"Whatever you’ve done, we’ve already forgiven you," he told Madam Salimah. "But you must promise me this is your last time. Because if you do it again, you will never see us anymore."

Those words, sharp and unwavering, seared themselves into her memory.

Haunted by the memory of her daughter’s cries at her arrest and driven by her son's words, Madam Salimah embarked on a path of recovery, determined to rebuild her life and her relationships.

She dedicated herself to contributing to society, volunteering to support other inmates and their families, and even offering motivational talks at the very prison where she once served time.

Her past, once a source of shame, now fuels her passion to make amends.

“I’m trying to give back,” she says simply.

Finding purpose in volunteering with organisations like New Life Stories, The Salvation Army, ItsRainingRaincoats, and SANA, she also collaborates with support groups and raises funds for community projects.

This is a new chapter, she acknowledges, one that focuses on healing. Madam Salimah hopes her story can serve as an inspiration to others facing similar struggles.

"If I can do it, others can do it too,” she says.