Care Corner offers free counselling for seniors to help them cope with loss

Social service agency Care Corner Singapore is expanding its free counselling service to any senior who needs help coping with the grief and losses of ageing, such as the loss of health, mobility and friends or loved ones.

Until now, such counselling was available only to those already using one of its services or programmes. With the programme’s expansion, Care Corner will be one of a handful of agencies offering free counselling to seniors to help them cope with the issues related to ageing and loss.

Its senior counsellor Philip Chan said: “Seniors often tell me they want to die. They say they no longer feel useful, and they do not wish to burden others.

“And we want to listen to them and help them alleviate their fears and frustrations.”

For a start, from this month, Care Corner Gerontological Counselling Unit will offer such counselling to residents of Toa Payoh, Marsiling and Woodlands, as it already runs centres and services for seniors in these areas. It hopes to extend this service islandwide in future.

In 2021, Care Corner started providing such counselling to fill a gap in such services in the community, Mr Chan said.

He said that if the issues seniors struggle with are not resolved early, their well-being can deteriorate quickly and it becomes much harder to help them when they fall into depression or become suicidal.

The service is provided free of charge by the charity as the elderly are often unable to afford or unwilling to spend money on counselling, he added.

Trained counsellors visit the senior’s home to counsel the person, especially if the senior has mobility issues.

Mr Chan said: “It is very hard to get them to come to us if they are not mobile. And they may feel it is a waste of their time and money. So we go to their homes as they feel more comfortable in their own homes.”

Sage Counselling Centre also provides free counselling to Singaporeans and permanent residents to help them deal with their woes. Counselling can be done in person at its centre in Jurong Point mall, over the phone or through zoom, or at home if the person has disabilities or is housebound, said its executive director Grace Lee.

Counsellors said the rates charged for counselling or psychiatric help in private practice range from $180 to $350 or more per hour, putting it out of reach of many seniors.

Common problems faced by seniors include a loss of health or mobility and tensions with their children and family members, counsellors say.

Ms Lee said the lives of many women revolve around their children, and they can feel lonely and displaced when their children get married or move out, and communicate less.

The loss of purpose and direction in life after retirement is yet another challenge, Mr Chan said.

He said: “The sense of loss that they feel is worsened if they do not have good relationships with their children. And loneliness is a big issue that many seniors face.”

One of Care Corner’s clients was a man in his 70s who suffered from insomnia and became very moody after he retired as a fishmonger. The widower did not know what to do with so much free time, Mr Chan said, and felt useless.

He found it hard to sleep at night as he was used to working in the wee hours of the morning and sleeping in the day. After counselling, the widower joined activities run by Care Corner Active Ageing Centre and started taking his grandchildren to and from school, among other things, to keep himself busy and active.

He now feels happier, said Mr Chan.

Staff will also link seniors they counsel with other services and programmes that provide the support they need, he added.

Sage Counselling Centre has seen more seniors seek counselling since the pandemic started. Work-from-home arrangements have led to more family conflicts, Ms Lee said, and are one reason for the rise in cases.

Ms Lee said that counselling helps seniors to discuss their feelings and needs and learn new coping skills.

She added: “Covid-19 has caused lots of anxieties and uncertainties for seniors, especially with isolation, changes in social activities, and it creates ambivalence about the future.“

Where to get help

• Sage Counselling Centre: 6354-1191
• The Seniors Helpline, run by Sage Counselling Centre: 1800-555-5555
• Care Corner Singapore: 6258-6601